Save Your Spoons in December

inThere’s a type of magic that comes with the month of December. The lights turn on earlier, the traditions come back, and there’s just this unspoken need to mean it. But for many, especially those dealing with chronic illnesses, loved ones to care for, or just so much energy, the holiday season just might not seem so magical.

At BeWell, we think it doesn’t have to be an either/or situation during the holiday season. You can choose not to do it all and still have a special December. This is where some of the best holiday memories can come from, slowing down, simplifying, and celebrating what your body and mind can manage.

“This season of life, it’s not about denial and ‘saving’ spoons; it’s about choice, to choose where you place your energy, so you can fully appreciate the experiences that matter most,” she explains.

Let Convenience Be a Tool, Not a Guilt

One of the most draining experiences that this time of year brings, however, is holiday shopping. The crowds, standing in line, and underlying tension of overwhelm are enough to drain you in a fraction of the time that this month should take up in full.

Online shopping, curbside pickup, and delivery options are not cheats; these are concessions that allow you to save your energies for those activities that bring you joy as opposed to draining them before the midpoint of this month has passed.

Groceries, returning goods, and running errands are all examples of this as well. If you are able, try grouping these types of tasks together when possible, and choose options that allow you to stay at home. The less travel, the less use of your spoons.

Reduce Traditions, Don’t Reduce Their Meaning

Gift wrapping, baking, or decorating have historically become shrouded in nostalgia, which makes it difficult at times to hinge or align expectations. Traditions, however, do not lose their meaning simply because they change.

Reusable wrapping, like gift bags, or setting aside the wrapping of a few gifts throughout the year, makes it doable. And let’s not forget that baking does not have to mean hours spent in the kitchen. Simple treats, even store-bought ones, are full of love.

None of that needs to happen all at once, decorating the tree, stringing up the lights. Maybe this is an activity that doesn’t necessarily have to feel like work, but could be something enjoyable in smaller chunks, as an event among other events.

There Can Be Numerous Forms of Hosting

Most tiresome is the notion that one host must do all the work of entertaining. Potluck gatherings, catered affairs, or inviting guests to help with setup and cleanup are all rational, enabling decisions. Most people will accommodate. They just have to be asked.

It’s okay not to host anything, either. It's the presence that counts, not the packaging, and the best gift you might be able to give yourself and others could be the gift of taking care of your energy.

Give Yourself Permission with Social Commitments

December brings with it a crowded calendar and the pressure of committing to everything. Pace yourself. Say what you need, plan for late arrivals or early exits—or choose to stay home altogether. That is not rude—it’s self-respect.

You don’t owe anyone your exhaustion.

“Rest is also a part of the season.”

Sleep doesn’t have to be earned as long as all other tasks are complete. Incorporating rest into your schedule of tasks can help balance out your entire month.

What about quiet nights staying at home, cozy nights with a blanket and a video, or even better—empty days planned accordingly—are somehow indicative of times when you’re missing out when, in reality, they are a sign of paying attention to what your body is trying to tell you. In truth, these are often far more celebratory nights than many nights out with parties and socializing.

Progress is progress. Cleaning, organizing, preparing—none of it needs to get done in one day. One room per day is all that is necessary. One small project per day is all that needs to be accomplished. And enough, too, with the decision to outsource as much help as possible.

The Holidays Are Not a Performance

The holidays are a season to be lived.

A Gentle Reminder

December does not have to be perfect in order to be meaningful. You can slow down, accomplish less, and put your needs first.

Protection of your energy reserves isn’t selfish, it’s necessary for you. Let the comfort of the season be your guide during the holidays.